Day Three and Day Four

Today was day four, but I didn’t write anything about day three, so I’ll start with yesterday.

Sooo I woke up feeling wretched yesterday, and it didn’t improve, and then there was some vomiting. I know, gross. Suffice to say, Jenna did not run. The Man did, though, and he did the whole thing. I gots to say, I was really proud of him for going ahead and doing it. He said it was a lot harder not running with me, which made me feel all warm and fuzzy and wanted.

Today I woke up feeling fine, and knew that this evening we would be going running.

It was really, really hard for me today. I don’t know if it’s because I felt like crud all day yesterday, or wasn’t hydrated enough, or because I skipped a day, but today I found myself really struggling. I cut short one of the two minutes segments, and walked. I did run the whole set, though. It was so hard! It felt like my thighs gained about twenty pounds each. My ankles hurt, my lungs did that stupid burn thing, my body was just TIRED. It sucked. It was horrible. I hated it!

But I did it anyway.

I didn’t want to; I wanted to just stop, say SCREW THIS! and go home and eat cheesecake (and I don’t even have any cheesecake). However, I knew that I was going to feel this way, because as with all exercise programs, I ALWAYS feel this way by day three, or four, or sometimes even five. And I usually quit around then. I’m a wuss when it comes to this exercise stuff. The difference is, this time, I. am. determined.

I don’t want to be this chunka chunka anymore! I don’t want to buy another size up of pants! I want to be able to run with my best friend when we finally get together! I want to keep up with my children; I want to be a good example for them! I want to feel good, look good, and feel good about how I look instead of “accepting” and “being ok with” and “settling”.

I want this. I will have this. I want this more than I want to quit. So while I may bitch and moan and whine and complain, I want this more than I want almost anything right now.

And so I keep on.

The Man, however, did awesome today. He ran the whole thing smoothly and made it look easy. I was so proud of him! His determination makes me want it more. His hanging in there makes me want to keep up. I am so glad we’re doing this together. Eventually I know that he’ll run faster, because he’s pretty quick, and that’s alright with me. I just like that we’re starting out together and we’re doing it together. I’m proud of him for stepping up.

And, yeah. I’m out. Gotta shower!

Peace.