Disappointment and Progress

Weeeelllll. My workout today was… not that great.

My schedule is as follows- go Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, off Friday, go Saturday and Sunday, off Monday. I went yesterday morning, and had a GREAT workout. Then we went out last nite with some friends- stayed up late- so when I got up this morning I was pretty tired.

I put off going til late this afternoon (mistake number one).

I ate a lot of junk food today (mistake number two).

I didn’t hydrate hardly at all (mistake number three).

So when I got to the gym, I was already kinda tired. I wanted to work out, I felt good enough to, but just… dragging a little.

I hop on the treadmill, start going. I walk briskly for the first three minutes, then started running. I ran four minutes and thirty seconds. I felt pretty good, considering. Stiff, but good. Heart rate was good, felt like I was in the zone, determined to add another minute to my running time.

Theeeen my ankles started to hurt at the ten minute mark. This has been a problem in the past, and the number one reason why I cut my workouts short. Not this time, I told myself, determined to just muscle through it. I push myself. I watch the way my feet are landing, the lift of each step, how I’m stepping, adjusting… to no avail. It HURTS. It seems to be getting more painful with each step.

I think, well, it doesn’t hurt when I run, so I’m gonna run. Let me add that at this point, honestly, I just want to get off the treadmill entirely. Although I started out strong, I am dragging. I am tired. I just don’t wanna!

But, I run instead. I manage four minutes. Then I slow it down again, thinking that maybe I had run the pain out of the muscles in my ankles, but nope. Still hurts. If anything, it feels worse than before.

So at the twenty minute mark, with only eight minutes and thirty seconds of running under my belt, I hit “stop” and get off the treadmill. I head over to the back of the gym where they have mats spread out. I do some deep stretching, focusing on my ankles, and relax. After about seven minutes of this, I get up, go back to the treadmills, and get back on. I walked for a few minutes, and no pain. The stretching seemed to have done the trick. Not a twinge, not a thing. Pain all gone.

However, my body was still tired. I wanted to stop and go home. Instead, I sped the pace up and ran for three minutes. Then I slowed it back down, walked some. Then ran two more minutes.

Aaaand at that point, I was done. Done, done, done. My head wasn’t in it, my body was tired, I felt heart sore with disappointment at my lack of motivation.

I felt like I had given up.

I ran a total of thirteen minutes and thirty seconds which is actually three minutes longer than yesterday. So why do I feel like I didn’t do the best I could today?

Ugh. Tuesday will be better. I deem it so!